Accepting Limitations

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Heather

I haven’t been consistent with writing because, well… pandemic. We’re ok. We’re healthy. We’re working from home and taking care of kids. It took some time to adjust, to help our kids adjust, to refigure out how to get groceries, and get used to this new reality we’re all facing. Writing fell to the wayside for a long time.

I’ve had to learn to be ok with failures. When I suddenly loose the structures I depend on to manage my ADHD, everything else falls apart too.This blog is a fun hobby that I hope helps people. It’s not high on my priority list. I took time to get all the other pieces of my life running reasonably well before I could turn my attention to writing here. (Full disclosure: I’m supposed to be priming a ceiling right now, I might be using this as a delay tactic.) 

And 2020 was like nothing any of us have experienced before.

One of my favorite authors, Jon Acuff, said something along the lines of, “It’s ok if you’re bad at living through a pandemic. You’ve never done this before.”

I’ve never lived through a pandemic before. Or an insurrection for that matter. The external structures that my brain requires have vanished. And in the middle of it, I’m parenting two young children with no childcare, no baby-sitters, no breaks. Its just my husband and I trying to keep up with the day, and hoping our nation holds together. 

At the beginning of this pandemic, I had a toddler and a baby. I’ve now got a preschooler and a toddler. So much change requiring so many adjustments have come our way over the past year. Routines are made, altered, and abandoned in rapid succession, and my brain is just trying to know which way is up.

So I haven’t written much. And that’s ok. 

The most important thing for me to learn about living with ADHD has been to accept my brain as it is: it’s weaknesses, strengths, quirks, and skills. At times it’s frustrating. I feel like I’m going to come out of my skin trying to keep up with responsibilities. But if I can accept my own limitations — ADHD related or otherwise — I can live more at peace with my own brain.